Wednesday, February 12, 2014

My heart is not here


My heart is just not here,
Where did it go I wonder?
It went to a country, I am passionate about.
More importantly it's the place where adoptions to the USA are now banned,
It's why it takes every effort not to burst into tears while watching the Olympics in that country wondering why the presidents don't care, 
I just want to punch & yell til my lungs grow hoarse at the P & O men when they show them on tv.
It hurts so much & I'm not even adopting so why do I care? 
Because I have a sister had she been born there she might have been stuck the rest of her days rocking back & forth with nothing to do. Yes, I would take her high off pitched singing anyday. On days when I just want to yell at her for the way she was unkind to me I choose to forgive her & love her regardless.
Sometimes I don't understand why God gave me this passion in particular for orphans in Russia if the doors to that country were going to be shut but I trust he has a plan for me & these orphans even if I don't see it yet.
You may think why should I care? Or you may not even know about the adoption ban or what happens to these kids if not adopted? Kids get transferred from the "baby house" between 4-6 years old to adult mental institutions. Conditions in these orphanages & institutions can be from babies/adults being tied to cribs all day, to sitting in their soiled diapers, to rocking back & forth, to getting beaten & bruised, & many more worse things happen. CHILDREN & ADULTS WITH SPECIAL NEEDS LIVING IN THESE PLACES HAVE AN 80% CHANCE OF DYING ALONE ACCORDING TO STATISTICS. Though some of the orphanages & mental institutions are okay nothing compares to the love a family can bring to a child. I'm tired of sitting around not doing more to help whatever way I can do to help orphans be adopted in Russia, change perspectives of special needs kids to be raised by their biological parents & have the resources to do so, & BRING ABOUT CHANGE!! This hurts so deeply that I'm gonna do something to help! I was going to write an update on my 21 for 21 final tally but that can wait. I had a blogpost in my draft folder that I was going to post about how angel tree ended but that too can wait its turn. RIGHT NOW DURING THE OLYMPICS I'M POSTING MY HEART OUT!! I don't care if only one person reads this or a dozen people read this I'm doing what I need to do & saying what's on my mind right now. 
Right now I'm not posting much about normal life or the Olympics, cause I care more about the kids who still wait like Natasha who will be my facebook profile picture during the remainder of the Olympics.
ITS TIME FOR SOME CHANGE! WILL YOU JOIN ME? PRAY LIKE I AM DOING FOR THE ORPHANS, PRESIDENTS O & P, & FOR ME AS I HURT BADLY FOR THESE PRECIOUS LIVES. I was going to go to their country before the ban now I just wait for what God has for me. Russia, still holds my heart & just wish I could have a clear answer what I should do about it. ADVOCATE & PLEASE OH PLEASE SHARE!! SHARE THE STORIES, POST THIS PICTURE ON YOUR FACEBOOK OR INSTAGRAM OR TWITTER OR WHATEVER I DON'T CARE JUST PLEASE HELP!!! I'm tired & worn, & I need some new friends to join I along with the others who have been fighting since the ban happened in December 2012! I know your busy & have a life to live, I'm busy with my life too but I'm taking just a short while to me to write what I'm passionate about. It truly would mean the world to me to have my friends standing with me on my passion & even just take one second to change their profile picture/share about these kids or 10 minutes to pray for these kids. Cause 1 life can make a difference! This is not about me but bringing Glory to the one True King! God tells us to care for the orphans in the bible & that's what I'm gonna do.